Episode 35. Starting A Love Affair Abroad (8 Steps To Radical Self Love)

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Today let’s talk about LOVE. About having a love affair abroad….

But of course, it’s not exactly what it sounds but rather, about deeply connecting, embracing and loving the most important person in your life. The one and only person that will be with you from the moment you’re born until the moment you die: You

The relationship you have with yourself will greatly affect all areas of your life. From the way you show up, interact with others or handle adversity.

In addition, on our international journeys we will feel lonely from time to time. Lonely because we don’t know anyone; because we haven’t found a close friend yet; because we’re different; or when our loved ones back home can’t relate to us and our experiences anymore. Loneliness is like a faithful travel companion.

But what makes loneliness less scary and sad is having a solid relationship to ourselves.

There’s this beautiful quote by Wayne Dyer: “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with”.

How to Have a Love Affair With Yourself Abroad?

It’s actually not much different than starting a love affair with a special somebody.

Here are 8 steps (listen to the full episode for all the details and stories):

Truly get to know YOU
Be curious and inquisitive and pay attention to what your heart, body and soul are trying to tell you!
Did you know that about 95% of our awareness is subconscious? That makes “getting to know ourselves” a never-ending journey. Still, the more we do, the better, easier and more enjoyable our lives will be!
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Make YOU a priority

Ask yourself regularly: “What would I like to do?” What truly feels good to me? What doesn’t?
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Keep your promises
Being a woman of your word makes you trustworthy to others, but also to yourself! According to Relationship Expert John Gottman, trust is one of the most important factors for a healthy relationship – and the same holds true for the relationship with yourself.
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Talk to YOU with loving kindness
Surely, you have a pretty clear idea of how your crush should talk to you, in order to woo you. And you’d quickly identify ‘red flags’ in the way he treats you, too. But what about the way you talk to yourself? To you allow your inner critic to put you down?
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Take YOU out on a date
I really enjoy spending some quality time with myself. I sometimes go out for lunch and will treat that like a date (with myself) – it’s such a lovely act of self-care! What date would you take yourself on?
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Write a love letter…
… to a part of yourself you dislike. What good has come out of that flaw? Can you show it some sort of appreciation and acceptance?
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Make healthy life choices
Oftentimes, what we consider a ‘treat’ is actually an unhealthy choice that’s not good for us. Where can you make better, healthier choices?
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Set boundaries
We sometimes avoid setting boundaries, because we don’t want to hurt others, don’t dare to say no or tell the truth. But this will actually cause an even greater detriment to our relationships, as we’ll likely grow resentful towards certain people or avoid them altogether. Boundaries are an important sign of self-love and respect.
Want to know more? E-mail me to learn about my 4 Step Plan to setting healthy boundaries (that won’t upset others and will feel good to you!)